Dr. Iris Bettan
How To Change Your Partner Without Changing Your Partner
How are we supposed to change anyone else who is so set in their ways when we can't even take the time to look inside of ourselves and make those inner changes? Even when we do take the time and know where we want to go, it's challenging enough so why would it be any easier to try to change someone else? I wanted to share a few tips and ideas on how to restructure a certain mindset and take the time to grow and learn together from a different perspective instead of just accepting what is.
1. Look at the whole situation and tell yourself the truth.
What is it exactly that is bothering you? Is it the way they dress, their behavior, the way they act next to your friends and family? The way they express themselves? Does it happen often? Don't worry, you are not alone. So the main point to notice is not what is wrong with my partner but why does it bother me so much.
2. There is not one person who is right.
It's not that you are right and they are wrong, or even vice versa. Everyone has their own version of the truth. Everyone tries to guide everyone else, but again sometimes there is simply not one person who is right in the situation. It is best to keep in mind that what we think is the right for us is not necessarily the best for them. We truly believe that if the behavior of our partner changes, it will change our relationship for the best. Relationships are all about perspective and keeping an open mind.
3. Tap into your partner's awareness
When we are not aware of our relationships, our patience gets short and we can upset quickly and we always try to find someone who meets every single one of our needs. When we see them in a holistic way we are aware of them as a full being with a soul, feelings, and a lifetime before, so we are more in tune and compassionate because we realize that their behavior is simply who they are.
Never forget that when you chose your partner, there was a symbiotic reason why you did so. Always in the beginning, there is the honeymoon phase that we love to dwell on, but we have to tap into those feelings and remember why and what that was. When we find a partner, it's never by coincidence, there is always some cosmic purpose of what they are in your life. Behind the physical state of what is, there is always some more spiritual purpose that connected you both. When we look at a relationship from a more empathetic perspective we can build a healthy relationship that can flourish together.
"To truly love is to accept and to be accepted."
With a Sex Coach Session, we learn how to truly express ourselves without feeling helplessness and understanding that we are all responsible for what we say and do. Every relationship is based upon what we can bring to the table instead of what we expect our partners to bring. Instead of placing the accusations on one or another, try to use sentences starting with "I Feel" instead of "You did." Realizing that there are issues that can arise and we are seeking change, it can pull us to work together as a team with the help of my services. Never forget that there is no such thing as problems, they are just disguised as opportunities.
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